patrick Boniface sent a message to Scott Flanders that said:
Dear Mr Flanders,
I am emailing you to let you know just how badly I feel let down by the Playboy organisation. I live in the UK and we only receive Playboy editions that are two months out of date. In fact this week (third week of November) we only just received October\'s, ie eight weeks late in the UK.
To add insult to injury I sent a tongue in cheek email to your head of Customer Services regarding this matter and she has completely and utterly ignored me, not even a simple acknowledgement that your company gives a rat\'s arse about us here in the UK. This is insulting and rude. I have sent her another email today to which I totally expect to hear nothing at all.
Needless to say that I love all that Playboy represents and I adore the clubs but why are we in the UK so badly treated by Playboy as an organisation?
I have attached the emails I sent to your quite frankly appalling Head of Customer services for your information.
Regards
Patrick Boniface
Sent 11/21/15
Hello
I wrote an email to you on 15 November with a tongue in cheek style regarding the non availability of current editions of Playboy to the residents of the UK. Sadly, but not unexpectedly, you chose to completely ignore this email from a âcustomerâ so much for the much vaunted American standard of customer services...oh whoops youâre job is Head of Customer Services!
I used to work in customer services and if I ever had the temerity to ignore a customerâs email, letter, phone call or whatever...Iâd have been hauled in front of my boss and probably been fired! But hey I guess youâre the boss and you can chose who to ignore and who to respond to. Guess I am not important enough to warrant even a simple acknowledgement.
Youâre stance in not replying has left a sour, nasty taste in my mouth and I am ânot a satisfied customer of Playboyâ.
Patrick Boniface
Sent 11/15/15
Theresa Hennessey, Vice President, Public Relations
Hello
Sometimes when I think of Playboy I imagine that I must be sitting looking out over the rust red landscape of Mars breathing in lungfullâs of carbon dioxide, or flying in a spaceship somewhere between the orbits of Jupiter and Saturn. Perhaps I have got lost in the jungles of Borneo or I am sailing my yacht single handed in a wild and vicious sea. Why? Because that is the only way I can think to explain how long it takes for Playboy to arrive in the United Kingdom!
My name is Patrick Boniface and let me first say that I am an avid fan of Playboy, the clubs, the bunnies, everything about the organisation except for one major thing....I live in the United Kingdom and work as a journalist and we seem to be thought of by the Americans as a backwater in the middle of the North Atlantic because we can never get up to date editions of Playboy. In fact today is 15 November 2015 and we still have not had the October issue released into our stores yet and you have already published Novemberâs in the States. This is clearly an appalling situation as all the content whilst still interesting is out of date and obsolete. I hear you say set up a subscription to ensure that you get your copy on time...well I tried this approach and it is exactly the same...two months late. Also I donât want to view Playboy online as I like the magazine format.
Okay, a simple piece of geography 101. The United States and the United Kingdom are separated by the North Atlantic. Is there a new Bermuda Triangle somewhere in the middle of the ocean no one is talking about where every Playboy magazine goes missing? Surely not, somebody would have blabbed about something as dangerous as that. Besides nothing else seems to have been going astray. Around five hundred long distance airplanes cross the North Atlantic every single day in around six hours. Even clumsy, clunky old rust bucket ships plodding across the 6000 miles distance can do it in around six days. In fact I have been doing some basic math and I have established that in the time it takes Playboy to send one magazine across the Atlantic NASA could have sent seven missions to the Moon and back plus some time to explore the surface in between. To add further insult to injury I recently ordered something from a lovely lady in Mississippi on ebay and it arrived on my doorstep four days later! God bless the US Mail Service.
How can an organisation as established as Playboy have such a dreadful distribution and logistics set up? Is Playboy really as bad as it appears to be, or is it something more fundamental such as a dislike of all things British? Needless to say I will keep going into my local store awaiting the arrival of the latest, sorry two editions back, copy of the magazine and keep pestering the newsagent asking when, when, when and getting the reply....your guess is as good as mine.
PLAYBOY please, please get your house in order, the British love you, hell I do too, Iâd just like to see it when the rest of the world does too!
Patrick Boniface
